Crazy beautiful
by Fishyqueen
Summary: A/N Quack Quack's real name is Brian   it's based on the movie Crazy Beautiful. only mine has the people from the show growing up gotti in it. john gotti plays the Kristin part and Lizzie plays the jay part. will john be able to quit and face his demons.
1. Chapter 1

Based on Crazy/Beautiful

Chapter One

In LS Highschool

John in class listening to teacher telling the class to write a story. John was drawing. He asked to go to the bathroom and his brother followed. He walked outside where his friends were. He lay on the bench and pulled out a joint and started to smoke. Lizzie was watching John outside laughing. She got the past to go the bathroom and went outside. She walked up to the guys. John looked up in cloudy fog.

"Hey now. You are."

"I'm Lizzie Spears. Who are you?"

"John Gotti Agnello. You came here to hang." Their eyes met and they fell in love.

"What are you doing here?"

"Having fun. This is my brother Carmine." She picked up the joint and the school monitor came up.

"What is this here? You were getting high instead on going to class."

"I have a pass here."

"A pass to get high. You all have detention." They were all washing the lunchroom then John started to joke around. Lizzie started to walk on the bus then she saw the boys and got into the car. The next day she saw him again.

"Come to get me into trouble again?"

"Nah. We're off duty. We're not troublemakers, we're innocent. Don't we look innocent together?" The flashed their brown eyes at them.

"Yea."

"You want come to see my brother football game."

"Sure." They went to the game. The two drank while watching the game." After the game they went to a back alley.

"I want to kiss you."

"I want to kiss you too." John and Lizzie start to makeout. Carmine looked at him.

"You guys should get room." The day at school Lizzie was in the dark room. When John showed up. The two started to kiss. He put his hands up in her shirt the two bumped into the table. He pushed up against her. She took off his shirt. He went for her skirt. He started to kiss her neck and touching her breasts. John pushed himself into her. She started to moan and sweat. When they were done she called out his name.

"That was the best."

"So i heard you hang out here."

"I love to take pictures." The two walked out and got into his car his brother was in the backseat sleeping. He pulled out some dope and gave it to her. She started to smoke. He took a long smoke and when took a drink. She drank too. They drove around and John got wasted. He pulled into an alley. He got out a car and fell. The two started to kiss.

"I love you."

"I love you. Shouldn't we get back to school?"

"Why. Don't worry. See we're smart and we just ditch and do our homework. I'm so fucking wasted. Around 3:00 he look her home.

"Act like nothing happened. My mom doesn't know about the drugs." He put some eye makeup and walked in.

"Ma we're home. This is my girlfriend Lizzie."

"John i heard that you weren't in school. Did you ditch again?"

"No ma i there i all day. You know i wouldn't ditch." John took her upstairs. The two got high and drunk. The two started to have more sex again. They were both in love. Lizzie didn't know that John in "trouble". She walked to the bathroom and Frankie came up to her.

"You know my brother has a drug problem. He tricks my mom into thinking things are fine but she knows. I think you should just leave. He doesn't know what he's doing."

"He's fine. He smokes but that is it."

"You want act clueless go ahead." John and Lizzie left the house. His mom caught him before he left the house.

"Are you stoned?"

"Ma you know i don't do that stuff."

"You want to believe you. Your older brother is drunk and you want to turn my head." He took her arm and ran out the house. They both got into his BMW and drove off. He put his arm around her and smiled.

"You know I'm not stoned baby."

"I know." They drove around for about 2 hours. John heard the cops following them.

"Fuck. You have to take the wheel." Lizzie crawled over John, he got into the back of the car and looked asleep. The cop came to the window and looked at her.

"You were driving quite fast and erratically. It looked like you were stoned."

"Sorry my friend got sick and had to help him that why i driving like that. It wouldn't happen again."

"Make sure it doesn't." John pulled a bottle of jack and drank about a half of it he smiled at her.

"You saved my ass. One time they pulled me over and took me home. Ma had a fit, she went on about how i have a problem."

"You're Crazy."

"And you're beautiful." He kissed her long and hard. They fell asleep in the car in his driveway. He woke up to screaming.

"Get the fucking car out the way. I have get places."

"Shut the fuck up Carmine. Where are going in such hurry and don't say school."

"Places. What did you get high and fall asleep in car again." He parked the car on the side of road and went back into the house. He ran up to his room to get dressed. He took his liquor and poured it into a water bottle grabbed the drugs and left. He was stopped at door by Victoria.

"Where were you last night?"

"I slept in my car last night. Look I'm fine nothing happened. I have to go."

"You're not fine. What is in the bag? He tried to grab away. She grabbed at it and it opened and everything fell out. He tried to put everything back in before she would see.

"What is it John drugs? No school work. When was the last time you had school stuff in the bag?"

"This is my school notebook." She opened it and saw a bunch was dirty drawings.

"This is not school stuff. Don't lie to me. Tell what really going on here."

"Carmine is buying liquor right now."

"Don't change the subject. You're druggy i want to help you."

"Open your eyes mom I'm fine. I get straight A's do all my work." She started to cry.

"Just go." He drove to school really upset. He sat on bench and just drank. Lizzie came up to him.

"What happened?"

"My mom searched my bag." His brother was wasted already.

"You want to go make out." The school monitor came up as John left. He saw Carmine drunk and took him away.

"Where's your brother. I know he has something to with this."

"Trust me he didn't. He's not here." In the dark room Lizzie and John were making out.

"Lizzie i want to get out here. Leave and go somewhere that they can't find us."

"Why."

"Everything fucking crazy. I hate the face that everyone fucking blaming me. My brother been fucked up for years but I've been the one everyone blames."

"Don't worry I'll be there for i promise."

"Promise baby that you'll never go away. With out you I'll be nothing." They both went to classes. Lizzie didn't know that John was into bigger drugs when she knew about. Lizzie and John had only one class together and it was gym. In gym John all pale and looking sick the teacher came up to him and looked into his red shot eyes.

"Are you ok Mr. Agnello. You do look right. Where is your brother."

"What do look like his fucking keeper?"

"Watch your mouth."

"Can i go to the bathroom?" He went to the bathroom and smoked some more pot and came back. It was their last class of the day so they were gonna go home. She went to his house again. He walked in the door and his mom didn't say a word. He went upstairs where he smoked some coke. Victoria called him down to talk.

"John come downstairs we need to talk."

"Ma there's nothing to talk about."

"Get down here now." John walked downstairs. Lizzie and Frankie stood by the stairs listening.

"Ma there's noting up." She had a bottle and bag on the counter.

"I know that you are on drugs. I went into ya room when you left and found this stuff."

"Why can't you just back off?" Just when John's nose started to bleed. He noticed that and put a napkin to his nose.

"Why is your nose bleeding?"

"It's not big thing. Carmine and I got into a big fight."

"I know that is a lie. Carmine has been passed out for hours."

"What."

"Carmine came home wasted from school and passed out on the floor." John started to walk up and Victoria grabbed his arm.

"You think you can walk away and will go away." There was no answer. John could see that she was crying.

"Get the fuck off my arm. I don't need this shit. Look do me a favor and don't talk to me again." John walked upstairs and Lizzie followed


	2. POVS

Chapter 2(POV'S)

Lizzie's POV

I couldn't believe the fight that happened. I didn't know to do. I know everything, why he was bleeding and more. I didn't know what to do. I just followed John. When i saw his mom cry i know that was bigger when John said it was. I loved John but i wasn't sure what do say to him. I felt bad for his younger brother who had to live though all this craziness. I know that Frankie was feeling it more then me. I never saw a fight like that. It was scary seeing him fight like that. Now i knew why he wanted to get out this place. I went over to him who was crying. I went to hold him and he tried away.

Frankie's POV

I wish things were like 4 years ago when everything was great. John was just 13 and not on drugs and Carmine wasn't drunk all the time. I was upset i didn't know what to do. This happened all the time so i just trained myself to not feel again so i wouldn't end up like them. I felt so bad for ma she wanted to make things right. I want to go away from all this miss and make a new life for me.

Victoria's POV

I can't believe John. His not my son anymore he's too high to realize what is happening around him. He has a girlfriend who looked like she doesn't know what is really going on. I feel like i want to tell her what is really going on, so he won't screw her life too. I think that John needs her too and taking her away might make things worst. I think she knows more then i do and could help me. I wish that he could quit.

John's POV

People spend their time telling me I'm a drug addict. I'm' glad that my brother doesn't give me shit about what happening. My mom needs to back off. This has nothing to with her. I'm fine the same person i am but older. I drink a little bit but not like Carmine i don't get drunk. I don't know where she gets off talking to me like that. I'm leave so she can't make my life a living hell. She's more concerned with me the Carmine who's worst off then me.

Lizzie's POV

I love John so much. I know that he out of control but he won't say anything. I wish i knew why he's doing this to himself. I think that he was following his brother. I wish that John could tell me everything. If he did that i wouldn't tell anyone.

Frankie's POV

John came home with this girl who loves him so much. He got her brainwashed to think that he ok. He shouldn't drag people down with him just to keep a secret. I'm scared that something is gonna go down that we can't handle and it was gonna tear as apart.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

2002 when it all happened.

John was 15, Carmine was 16 and Frankie was 12.

Carmine started drinking and trying to hide it but John knew that something was up. One day John walked into Carmine's room and saw him drinking and getting high. He went over to him to ask what is up.

"What you doing."

"Get the fuck out of my room. What did mom sent you up to check on me."

"No. Just wanted to know what you doing."

"You really want you."

"Yes."

"Getting high and wasted. Listen I'm fine. Don't listen to what mom says about me ok."

"I guess." He walked out of Carmine's room and into his room. He put on Fabulous and started to cry. That was about the time he could here ma and Carmine having a big fight. He put his music louder but couldn't block it out. He saw Carmine walk out his room. He went to back into Carmine's room. He found liquor bottles and cigarettes. He took a drink and started to feel better. He took the bottles and 3 cigarettes and went into his room. For that first time get drunk. He didn't like getting sick but the feeling was a great high. The cigarettes made him feel better too. He felt happier and could block out what he felt inside.

Back to now

Lizzie went downstairs to where his mother was still crying. She went over to her.

"Look I'm sorry for what happened."

"Thank you. I need to tell something. I want you stay away from John."

"Why."

"You see how he is. He doesn't know that is happened. I want to do for his one good." She didn't know what to think about what she said. She walked back upstairs. She looked at one more time

"If you love like you say. Then you will stay away from him." John over heard what they were saying and started to cry. He ran downstairs crying and mad. By that time Lizzie left to think about everything. John looked his mom in the eye.

"Why do you hate so much? How could you tell the only person in the world that i love, that i care about so much, to stay away from me? Do you think that the only thing I'll ever do to someone is screw them up? That I'm not worth loving."

"I don't hate you and you know that. I don't think any of that. I just you to get help. I love you with all my heart."

"Your problem in this world is that you too hooked up on what you want to care what i think."

"John do you really think that."

"What you want to save i love you and then hug you. Well that won't happen." She slapped around the face and walked away. John took his car keys and left. He got into his car and drank a lot of liquor and started the car. He was crying and very drunk. He pulled out of the driveway and got hit by a car. He was rushed to the hospital. When he woke up the hospital he was tied down and felt like shit. He called for the nurse.

"Why i am i here. Get me untied."

"Mr. Agnello Gotti you were in a car crash. You tried to hurt the doctors. You don't remember anything because we got you clean. Do you want me to call your family?"

"No can you call Lizzie Spears."

"Sure." Lizzie came about 20 minutes later. She looked at John who was bruised and pale.

"John are you ok."

"Better that you're here. Don't call my mom. Lizzie I want you to go to house and get my stuff. You know what stuff i want. If she asks about me say you don't know."

"Why."

"Stuff happened there. I'm not going back there."

"I'll do that for you." She went over to his house. His mom was still crying. This time Carmine was up. She looked at Lizzie and wondered why she was here.

"Where is John? I hit John and I'm sorry." She went up to his room and packed up his stuff and started to leave when she went to the door.

"Lizzie listen to me. Where is John, please tell me."

"He is at the hospital after a car crash but he doesn't want you there."

"Just tell him that I'm sorry and i never meant to hurt him."

"I will." Lizzie went back to the hospital to give John his stuff.

"John your mom wanted to know where you. I told her." John rolled his eyes. About 5 minutes later Victoria showed up, she was wearing a white sweat suit.

"John I heard what happened. Are you ok?"

"I'm fine. I don't need you here."

"John I'm your mother. I have to be here."

"Well if you want to help me. Just leave." She was too over come with sadness to answer back. When she left John called Quack Quack.

"Brian this is John."

"What do you want?"

"I need you to bring suitcase to my house and pack my clothes and the other things. If ma asks what is up just say that you are helping me."

"What is this about? Are you in trouble?"

"Right now you're one of the only people I can trust. I need to get out here tonight. Come to the hospital and say that you're my father and sign me out."

"Shouldn't I tell Victoria what is going on?"

"No I don't want her to know."

"Fine." John hung up the phone just as the doctor came into his room.

"Mr. Agnello are you aware of what happened to you."

"Ya I go into a car crash."

"Did you know that you were on drugs and were really drunk?"

"I know that. My father is coming to take me home."

"We want you stay here for a couple of days. " Quack Quack showed up to pack John things. He walked into his room and started to pack when he saw drugs and liquor. He figured out what was up. He packed everything and left. Lizzie told john what she going home to pack and that Brian would pick her up. John wrote a letter

Dear everybody,

I'm finally leaving. I need to get the fuck out here. I'm sick of people breathing down my fucking back. Ma since I'm leaving you can stop blaming me

John

Quack Quack picked up Lizzie and drove to the hospital to get John. He walked to his room.

"John I'm here. Are you ready yet?"

"Yeah." He was already dressed. The doctor came in shortly after.

"You must Mr. Agnello."

"I'm here to take my son home. Before John got into the car he mailed his letter home. John shot up some coke and drank some jack.

"John tell me what is up with you."

"Look things are fucked and I need to get out here. Drive to California."

"I know that you're on drugs." John paused for awhile.

"What you're gonna tell ma right."

"No. I just wanted to see how you should react."

"Don't talk just drive. Look I'm leaving to get away from people breathing my back." Brian could tell that John was crying in the back.

"Look I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you upset."

"The reason I didn't say I word was I know you would judge."

"I knew about carmine. I didn't know about you. Victoria keeps talking about you. I want to know if want was true."

"So you don't believe her then."

"Umm. I don't know." Brian drove all night and got into Ohio around 8:00 in the morning. They went to hotel to stay. John left his cell at the hospital. He went to a cell store to buy a new one. He had 5,000 that he stole form Carmine's liquor safe. He looked at Lizzie and smiled.

"Look we need fake names. I'm Chris Agnello, what about Belle Spears?"

"I love it baby. What about your family."

"Fuck them. I stole all of Carmine's money."

"Why?"

"Well they were all about fucking me over. Carmine was all about stealing my stash."

"When we got California are we going to back to school?"

"For you I would. You might have to pretend to be my sister."

"I like it Belle Agnello. So what would make Quack Quack our dad?"

"Yep the only one we can trust." John was gonna rent a car. John and Lizzie both left there cars in New York. John got his new BMW this time black. John knew that running low on Liquor.

"Brian can pick me up come liquor, about ten things of it."

"I don't know."

"Come on I'm not like Carmine. Its just helps me relax."

"Fine I'll get you the stuffy you need. Both of older Gotti's had problems with drinking but none of them would say they did. Quack Quack got into his car to get John want he wanted. The moment that he left they went to the pool area to take swim. John loved to swim and drink


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four

In Westbury Carmine just stopped going to school spending all his drinkin, Victoria kept her cool for Frankie. Frankie knew Victoria couldn't take it anymore. They had no idea that everything would get wrose. In LA things won't any better, John was on "hard shit" now

One year later

Frankie was 15, John 18 and Carmine 19

Carmine ran out of alcohol and went to store twisted out of his mind. Before he get to the store he got in a accident. When the police found he was barely alive, when they got him the hospital Carmine had slipped into a coma. When Victoria came to the hospital the doctor had bad look on his face.

"Mrs. Gotti your son was in a really bad a accident. His blood alcohol was 1o times the legal limit. He slipped into a coma, we don't think he'll ever wake up." Victoria fell to the floor with tear streaming down her face.

"God no!" in La Lizzie was fed up with John's drug use because it was just the pot and little bit of coke. It was now really hard drugs like meth, heroin and much more coke. He couldn't even make a through a day of school. Lizzie couldn't get what happened the last day he was in school out of her mind.

May 20th 2004

John was so high he could stand up or stay awake. He turned to Lizzie smiling at her trying to make her see everything was fine but by this tiem she didn't believe it.

"don't worry everything is fine." He smoke from joint which meant in his mind everything was fine. 2 hours in class John could feel his whole body shake and feel weak, he turned to Lizzie.

"I really don't feel well." He started to sweat, John ran out of the classroom.

"My brother doesn't feel well I'm gonna make sure he's ok." Lizzie helped John to bathroom but before they get there John got sick in hallway coughing up blood.

"Chris we need to go the hospital you're really sick."

"Look I'm fin." Before he could finish he fell to the floor had a seizure she called 911.

"911 what is emergency."

"My brother is having a seizure after coughing of blood. "

"What caused you brother to this sick."

"he's using a lot of drugs."

"What kind."

"Pot, coke heroin. That all I know of." 10 minutes later they showed up and one of EMTS came up to her.

"Do you know if mixed the drugs?"

"I never seen him use all the drugs." On the way to the hospital she cried thinking about what just happened, an hour later the doctor came up to her.

"Ms. Angello. Your brother will be fine. He needs to get off the drugs. Or next time he will die." Lizzie didn't know that he was using meth now. When John woke up he saw Lizzie crying.

"Baby I'm fine. Don't worry I'll be fine."

"You're not fine you need to get off all the drugs. I'm not gonna stand by anymore and pretend everything is fine with you."

April 20 2005

Lizzie was off at college leaving John alone checking on him now and then. At lunch she deiced to call and check up on him. There was no answer, she rushed home. What she found shocked and sadded her. John was lying in bed in a pool of his on blood. She walked over to him, he was cold to the touch. Brian came home she turned him.

"How long as he been like this." "Like what." He turned and john lifeless and cried.

"I don't know Lizzie." She picked up the phone called in 911."

"911 what is your emergency."

"My brother is lifeless on the bed."

"Do you know what happened?"

"I came home and found him lying on his on blood."

"Are there any marks on him?" She checked and found drugs on the bed.

"I know he took a lot of drugs." She finally realized had happened.

"We're sending help." After she hung up the phone she turned to Brian with an angry look on her face.

"How could you leave him? If you were here maybe things could be different."

"When I left things were fine." The truth was when Brian was home John's door was locked but he couldn't tell her that." 10 minutes the EMTS got there after was 1 minute on turned to her.

"Your brother is gone and was about for hour." Lizzie broke down she picked up the phone and called Victoria."

"Victoria it's Lizzie you need to come to LA quick. Our address is 56 ridge way drive"

"What happened where is john." Lizzie tired to hold back the tears again."

"He died from a drug overdose and loses of blood."

After she hung up the phone she turned Brian again.  
"Tell me you didn't know something was wrong."

"I heard him throwing up." She punched him."

"And you did nothing to help him."

"I didn't it was blood. He told he was fine." Lying on the bed 2 notes one had on name on it

_Lizzie_

_I'm sorry for dragging you in this but couldn't image doing without you. When I said I was fine I said that so you wouldn't w3orry. I know things were bad but I'm done with this life. My only wish is that wished I could've kissed on last time. I hate that you found me this way. Knew I had a problem but I didn't care and I guess you figured that. As time passed thanks for staying my side after everything my mom told me about me. I was already fucked up long before we found each other. I was already 2 years in my addiction when met you. I didn't ant to face my problems once I was clean. You were the last one I thought about before I died._

_Love you always _

_John_

Victoria met them they went to the hospital, Victoria look at Brian with a mad look.

"Why did you let him die? You were supposed to stop him. Brian was fed up with everything thinking he let him die.

"Have you thought that he wanted to die and didn't want me to help him? John had his fuckin locked when I was around. So even if I wanted to help I couldn't have." They both slapped him Lizzie handed Victoria a note he wrote her.

_MA_

_Sorry I ran away but I need to be away. I know you mad at me because I died when you wanted to help me. I was tried of you all getting mad at me and let Carmine what he wanted. Carmine was just as fucked as me. I didn't mean to worry you. Tel Frankie and carmine that I loved them and never meant for them see everything. I truly loved you. I'm sorry for things I said or did. I'm happy now. Don't worry about what happened to me. I knew all I along that I needed help I just didn't want it." _

_Love_

_John_

A month later in Westbury LI they had John's funeral he was barely 18 when he died. Everyone was could tell Victoria was trying to hold it together. No one had heard from Brian since the day John died. Lizzie still wished she could've helped him. Everyone was still talking about how Lizzie found him and how Brian could've helped him. His grave stone read

John Gotti-Angello 1987-2005

Frankie came to Lizzie he wanted to the true story.

"What really happened to John Ma won't tell me the truth."

"John died of a drug overdose." She couldn't tell him how he was coughing up blood and was found a pool of his on blood.

"Is it true that Brian could've saved him?"

"Nope he wanted to go." That was hard for her say because it something she didn't really want to believe it.

2 years later

At the hospital Carmine woke up after years in a coma. The first thing did was cry because he thought about how he hurt Victoria. The doctor called Victoria and she came right away. When she got there she hugged him tight.

"Ma I'm sorry for hurting you with the drinking."

"I forgive you." He remembered John leaving home.

"Is John home yet?" Yes he was home because he buried in the family plot.

"I think it's too soon to talk about John."

"Please tell I can handle it."

"John is home but he's been gone for 2 year now."

"You said he was hone." That about the time it hit him and started to cry.

John is dead. It was the drugs right. How did I end up in a coma?"

"Yup it was the drugs. You were driving drunk and your car hit a wall." A week later Carmine left the hospital the first place he went was john's grave. It was so sad to know John didn't want help. He knew Frankie would glad to see Carmine was better.

"Is quack quack (Brian) back after he helped John run away?"

"We haven't from him for a long time. There is stuff about Brian you don't know." Carmine thought to him _did she know about fact that he into drugs worse when they were. _

"Tell what he did."

"We still believe he could've saved John even though John didn't want to be saved." Lizzie had moved away to Arkansas. When Carmine went into his bedroom he saw all the drugs and empty liqueur bottles he threw all of it out.

The day John died

He had his door locked and he just shot up. He started to feel sick and threw up blood all over himself it lasted 5 minutes. He started to feel short of breath so he took journal and started to write notes to Lizzie and MA. He didn't Brian to see him or he would take him the hospital. He wanted for Brian to leave fore he opened his door. As he got up he felt lightheaded. He went to life down and got sick again this it last for 20 minutes. This time he feel himself not be able breathe, he was blacken out. He felt bad for dying like and Lizzie finding out. With his last breath he said _"I love you Lizzie." "I'm sorry Ma"_

AK

Lizzie was living there because she could've live back LI. after John's death she took his journal and she read it maybe she find out why started to use drugs. This what she read:

_Brian is the only one Carmine and I trust because he would beer for us. But what most people don't know that he was much fucked up as us. We would get high and twisted together. He using drugs long before we got high, we just him into what we were using. The weird part was Victoria was completing clueless. When she was around he would ask more "shitfaced" then we were._

_Before I met my friend Chuck I only drank and smoked cigarettes and pot. He was the one that got me into coke he said it would make feel better. At first didn't like way it made me feel. Then started to like the feel. I was only 15 and hurting I didn't care. I hated hurting Ma with the drug use but she didn't understand why I did it or that was hurting. I figured it would hurt more to get off what was on then what I doing to MA._


End file.
